This book alarmed me from the get-go. Her family did not believe in school or doctors. Her father was a relgious fanatic. Her mother excelled in herbal tinctures. One older brother physically abused her. If she wore a dress above her knee or showed a shoulder, she was a slut. It is a riveting memoir about how Tara grows out of this background, which never quite lets go.
How can we come together is the theme song of the day. Reduce name calling, stop vicious trolling under false names on media. Don't stay in one news bubble; branch out; check sources and facts. Let me say up front that I am an independent but in the upcoming election am avidly for Jon Tester and Kathleen Williams as our representatives. I think Trump has degraded the government, allowed the pollution of air, soil, water, and reduced protection for wildlife. You may have different opinions. My evangelical daughter-in-law, for instance, has been a Trump supporter from the get-go. I asked her why. She said because she is against abortion and gay marriage. In the #MeToo movement she worries about her husband and son and says women lie. I gave a counter-opinion but we avoid discussion. It's wonderful to talk to people who have give and take. Let's try to create that atmosphere more.
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My bio:I attended Smith College, raised a son and daughter, lived in France three years, and worked as an editor for the National Audubon Society in New York City. I am the author of 10 nonfiction books, two fiction for children. My articles have appeared in numerous magazines.
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The Old Ones
His wife died after years of suffering in a nursing home. She served the husband who was a conductor with several orchestras. Became the voice of his American Indian Institute. Why always the server, not the initiator? He would say they were partners, that he couldn't have done a thing without her. But still. He lives in a big house, has meals served by Meals on Wheels, and a housecleaner. He is deaf and cannot drive anymore. He's 90.
Another 90-year-old woman still drives even in snow. She has family members who do things for her. A cat found her house. In the morning she gets coffee and cereal and takes to her bed. She lingers over her inspirational books. She goes to the Episcopal Church and several AA meetings weekly and is devoted to any AA member. She is pretty, warm, coiffed, and fashionable. She reads mysteries and likes movies. One of her sons was killed by a truck. She adopted two. Her daughter is a soft-spoken seamstress.
A woman in her 80s does not remember much but she remains cheerful and political. She lives in an assisted living after she lost the ability to see very well. She is also nearly deaf. She and friends meet to discuss politics.
My friends and I look ahead with dread.
Girls, like women in gym. Being "in.". In junior high I started a new school in Texas. It seemed friendships were already formed. On the playground I hung out with another shy girl. Her name was Sylvia. She was big and wore tent dresses. We swung on the swings and made small talk. Even then I knew she was a hick compared to me who had come from the big city of Chicago. There was a group of swish girls, who dressed well and were more or less pretty. One was homely but was a neighbor of the prettiest so she was in. Suddenly I was included. I don't know why nor if it was good for me.
The same at the gym class I go to now. At first I watched how a group of 6-7 clustered around each other before class started, laughing and talking. I would nod and exchange a word or two with one of them. Mostly I waited alone looking out the window. Then suddenly I've become part of the group.
What is it that makes girls decide you're ok? It's like a group of swallows changing direction.
Richard. ... has tended to my yard for 20 years. He works hard even in the cold and heat. He is strong with a jutting stomach. Wears suspenders on his old, baggy jeans. His mouth puckers sometimes uncomfortably close to mine, his hair and eyes are gray. He doesn't charge much. He has a hard time keeping track of his jobs. He is not professional but he knows his trees and shrubs and plants by their Latin names. Every winter he goes to seminars on trees, insects, and soil. In the spring he composes a "letter" to his clients. I type it up for him so it looks "good." The problem with Richard is that he is a repetitive talker. He could chew the fat for hours. Mostly complaining about all that he has to do or how wrong this or that landscaper is. I have had to learn to stop the flow.
The book gave me hope for us and the Earth-- the first to counter my despair over species disappearing.
Why didn’t Mr. Greenberg stick to Leslie Jamison’s book on alcoholic writers? She is a recovering alcoholic; he obviously is not. The Big Book is not synonymous with AA. Many attend AA meetings without ever reading the book. And what’s wrong with the program having been defined by two white guys? Are their contributions not to be recognized anymore? AA has helped numerous people stay sober. Why knock it? Why not praise its good qualities? Mr. Greenberg would not make a good therapist for those who have or who those around them think they have a problem with alcohol. Many therapists require clients to stop drinking to clear up their cloudy thinking. Greenberg is an intellectual enabler. Read More
Dante before envisioning The Divine Comedy.
When we stand at a crossroads and need to make a transition, we must first enter the dark night of the soul. Out of confusion and seeming chaos the new path emerges.
Everyone has difficulties—some inordinately hard but all essential to their calling. We struggle in relationships, work, health, and with how to live meaningfully. We must make transitions—literally die to one way of life and be reborn into another.
When we feel a failure or have a loss forced upon us, only one hope offers solace — that of starting over. The hope and dream of these moments of total crisis are to obtain a definitive and total renovatio, a renewal capable of transmuting life. Even the nonreligious in the depths of their being sometimes feel the desire for this kind of spiritual transformation.
When we must die to the old way and be reborn to the new, the rites of mysteries and the images of myths bring us comfort. They help us to get out of the purely cognitive mode and find truths in deeper, soulful ways.— Read More
in your memoir; fiction or nonfiction
5 Tips for uncovering it
Always start with a short meditation or quiet moment to improve your concentration
1 Write an anecdote from one period of the person’s life. If a memoir, choose yourself.
2 Describe in detail two memories from that time. Include all your senses — touch (fabric), hearing, smell, sight, and taste (food is SO resonant).
3 What was going on for the person at this time? What decisions was he or she facing? What transition? What path did he or she not take?
4 Then pull your thoughts together and write a scene about this time in present or past tense. Select a point of view and establish a tone. Use action verbs. Try to avoid “was” or “there” as they are weak words.
5 Use dialogue between people that has tension or humor in it.
Now you have a section, maybe a chapter, and can go on to the next.